“Give to him [to the poor], and don’t have a stingy heart when you give, and because of this the Lord your God will bless you in all your work and in everything you do.” Deuteronomy 15:10
In None of These Diseases, Dr. S. I. McMillen discussed the financier John D Rockefeller. As a young man, Rockefeller was strong and husky, and he drove himself like a slave. He was a millionaire by age 33. By 43, he controlled the largest business on earth. By 53, he was the world’s only billionaire. But he developed a disease called alopecia, in which he lost hair from his head, eyebrows, and eyelashes. His digestion was terrible, and he lost weight until he looked like a dead man. The newspapers began compiling his obituary.
One night Rockefeller realized he couldn’t take one dime into the next world. All his accomplishments were sand castles, doomed by the inevitable tide. For the first time he realized money was not a commodity to be hoarded but to be shared. He began transferring his money into blessings for others. He gave hundreds of millions to universities, hospitals, and missions. He led efforts to rid the South of hookworms and in the development of penicillin. The focus of his life changed from getting to giving. The result? He didn’t die in his fifty-third year, or in his fifty-fourth. He lived to be 98.
BOTTOM LINE:
Whether or not Rockefeller was a born-again believer, I don’t know. But he did discover one of the moral laws God has placed in plain sight in the universe for everyone to enjoy, Christian or not: Giving is good for us. It enriches our lives.
Merlin continuing:
Researching John DR for an hour, gave me these observations. His father, William A., was a con artist, unshackled by conventional morality, led a vagabond existence, returning to his family infrequently, abandoning them permanently when John was 15. His mother, Eliza, was a homemaker, a devout Baptist, thrifty by necessity, being more influential in John’s upbringing and beyond, while John distanced himself further and further from his father as he matured. He later stated, “From the beginning, I was trained to work, to save, and to give.” As a youth, Rockefeller reportedly said that his two great ambitions were to make a $100,000 (equivalent to $3.27 M in 2023 dollars) and to live 100 years.
What follows below are two excerpts I gleaned from Are You Fully Charged (AYFC) during my first reading that spoke volumes to the “molding” that occurred with Tom, early on and later in his life, via his grandfather, an opportunity that didn’t materialize for many of us relationship wise, except via genetic code, and certainly not for Rockefeller either. I have below strategically highlighted these pages of AYFC to acquaint you with this “life-compass setting book” beginning by quoting Tom’s first reference to his grandfather from page 40 where he states “the more time you spend on building on who you already are, the faster you will grow. That is the main lesson I learned from my late mentor and grandfather, Don Clifton, who spent a lifetime studying people’s strengths. Instead of aspiring to be anything you want to be, you should aim to be more of who you already are, starting with your natural talents – then investing time in practicing, building skills, and increasing knowledge – yields a much greater return.
Gallup’s research suggests that when you use your strengths, you can double your number of high-quality work hours per week from 20 to 40. It also reveals that people who focus on their strengths every day are six times as likely to be engaged in their jobs and more than three times as likely to have high levels of overall life satisfaction. If you spend most of your life being good at everything, you eliminate your chances of being great at anything…”
Later in Chapter 15, Build a Cumulative Advantage, on page 112, in the Section subtitled “Help Someone See What Could Be”, Tom continues “As a result of my grandfather, Don Clifton’s, lifelong study of strengths, I was raised in an environment in which my family was looking for early traces of talent at every turn. By the time I was five, they had spotted my deep interest in reading. When I was nine, my grandfather noticed some entrepreneurial talent and helped me start a little business selling snacks. He helped me find space and figure out how to buy snacks in bulk. And he taught me some basic financial concepts. But the most valuable lessons I learned were about people, interactions, and relationships.
Throughout my grade school, high school, and college years, it became clear to me that my talents and interests were in the areas of business, research, and anything involving technology. When I graduated from college in 1998, Don asked me if I would work with him to bring his research on strengths to a wider audience through technology and this new thing called the Internet. I spent the next few years working with Don and our team to create an online strength-based assessment, dubbed StrengthsFinder. But in the midst of all this excitement around this new project, Don discovered he had Stage IV gastroesophageal cancer and most likely, only a few months to live.
Given that I had been battling cancer already for a decade at that time, I used my knowledge and dedicated all my time to helping my grandfather extend his life as much as possible. Don and I assembled all the research we could find on the topic as we traveled to different medical centers for treatment. In the midst of this ordeal, I remembered that Don told me once that he thought it was crazy that people wait until someone is gone to say kind things in an eulogy.
So, I stayed up late several nights and wrote a very long and emotional letter to my grandfather, explaining how much he had influenced my life over the years. It was essentially a eulogy written to someone who was still alive. This letter went into great depth about what a difference my grandfather’s ideas and approach to life made in me during this time. I explained how his love, caring, and thinking essentially built a reserve that helped me make it through all my health challenges in relatively good shape.
Because I had almost no confidence in my ability to communicate effectively in writing, I was hesitant to even share this heartfelt letter with Don – but given the circumstances, I decided to give it to him. When he read it, he was deeply moved and grateful. That part did not surprise me, but a brief interaction we had a few days later caught me off guard.
Don told me after reading the letter multiple times, he thought I had real talent for bringing things to life with words. (I agree!) This was something no one had ever suggested, let alone stated explicitly. He asked if I’d be willing to share my personal story from the letter in a book. As long as somebody else was doing the writing. I figured that would be okay.
Then Don asked me if I would help write that book over the next two months. This was the only time he ever acknowledged the reality of his condition in our conversations. So, I agreed to give it a shot and do my best, knowing that my grandfather had quite a bit of wisdom that could benefit other people. We worked tirelessly over the next couple of months and were able to finish the first draft of the book, How Full Is Your Bucket? just before Don passed away. That book has since helped my grandfather’s work reach millions of people, and we even turned it into a children’s book that is now used in classrooms around the world.
This personal experience showed me how a single interaction and observation can have a lifelong influence. After nearly three decades now of exploring my own talent, being surrounded by great people, and taking countless strengths assessments, writing was the last thing I ever planned to do. Then one day one person (my grandfather) said he spotted a talent worthy of investment, and that insight continues to influence how I spend my time every day, 24-7-365! The more I reflect on this experience, the more I realize the (our?) ultimate strength is finding, discovering, and developing talent in others.“
Life is truly all about relationships; Loving, enduring, meaningful, safe relationships. Communicate with me directly if you’ve ideas, questions, concerns: merlin.erb@gmail.com 330 465-2565 cell, Signal, What’s App.
NEXT UP:
Testimony of Robert Boyle, Father of Modern Chemistry
