Category: Personal Interest

Yes, but I’ve been under such conviction to finish what I started yesterday. Actually,I’d written the last seven paragraphs last evening after proofreading yesterday’s post, but then I accidentally erased them and it was too late and I was too tired so I sent it out without my concluding remarks. This morning being a new day, I was compelled to reconstruct them, and get this, first I erased them last night, and then today, immediately after rewriting my seven paragraphs at the bottom, I closed the computer and picked up David Jeremiah’s 2012 devotional Discovery: Experiencing God’s Word Day By Day and read the July 17 reading titled “Know Thyself”, and immediately wanted to throw up! Give me a break Satan! I really do believe someone out there besides me, needs to read these words, and I will not be deterred, even though during most of my life I would have flushed it and sought shade like Jonah.

As much as it is humanly and spiritually possible, everything I write is always to myself first. Perhaps that is why I’m so attracted to Dr. Henry Cloud’s books in that he addresses frequently my being over-introspective on one hand, and too quick too critical, on the other, causing me to often withdraw and so, I say nothing. Too often, I possess a nonconfrontive compliant spirit. You know, it IS humanly safer living that way today, like an ostrich! But God expectantly designed us for engagement, and even empowers us with the needed strength and resources to accomplish our Kingdom responsibilities. And therein lies the risk to lose our very own Kingdom rewards! The David Jeremiah reading I encountered is verbatim below:

Know Thyself. Psalm 139: 3

The ancient philosopher said, “Know thyself,” but that’s hard to do. Jeremiah 17:9 says, “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked; who can know it?” The apostle Paul cautioned us against being too quick to approve ourselves or condemn others, saying, “I care very little if I am judged by you … indeed, I do not even judge myself. My conscience is clear, but that does not make me innocent. It is the Lord who judges me” (I Corinthians 4: 3-4, NIV).

We must be careful about being overly self-introspective, and about being too quick to criticize others. As fallen creatures, we’re capable of wounding ourselves and others with our misguided judgements.

Yes, be discerning about right and wrong, and be willing to properly admonish someone when the Spirit leads; but remember there’s only One who can actually read the heart. How much better to say with the psalmist, “Search me, O God, and know my heart, try me and know my anxieties, and see if there is any wicked way in me, and lead me into the way everlasting.”

The best of (us) are too apt to judge rashly, and harshly, and unjustly; but (God’s) judgement is always according to truth. Matthew Henry (1662-1714)

Merlin now writing. Two other notable quotes of his are; “It ought to be the business of every day to prepare for our last day,” and, “The three qualifications of a good surgeon (imagine this in his era as opposed to today?) are requisite in a re-prover: He should have an eagle’s eye, a lion’s heart, and a ladies hand; in short, he should be endued with wisdom courage and meekness.”

Now here are my seven paragraphs that I was retroactively spazzing out about without any edits. I am really trying to be transparent with you.

While I myself was reflecting throughout Thursday on the last post, I keep being reminded of the in-our-face example of the ever-engaging apostle for Christ, Paul, from the Mars Hill account in Acts 17: 22-31. My question is where TODAY are the either publicly engaging persons, such as Paul (perhaps someday even Tucker?), or even some undercover ambassadors such as John Rich for Christ warriors, who were dealt a hot potato download from God that he took all the way to the mat, as he defined it?

And also, I am continually reminded, so I’ll ask you as well, do you recall the impetus behind the explosion of the early church in its first century, besides such as the whole book of Acts including Peter’s explosive preaching and Paul’s three missionary journey’s? And then again, what so moved our forefathers during & following the Reformation? Wasn’t it indeed also the waves of persecutions that scattered the early Christians throughout the then known world during the first century and then again in the centuries since Martin Luther, such as transplanting our very forefathers about Europe and America? And so I ask, what perhaps is God preparing us for now during these latter day rains, except to be scattered anew in ways we can’t even begin to fathom, or for sure, perhaps are choosing not to comprehend, preferring our seclusion as being the quiet in the land, when God is actually desiring to both tell and lead us to “go & do now” as in Wendell Martin’s recent vibrant book, Go Now.

Again, to me it seems too often we are weak anemic Kingdom specimens floundering about like the ten foolish virgins waiting ill-prepared to piggy back or sponge off the virtuous ten wise prepared virgins, being so deceived that while we’re anticipating and awaiting the approaching celebration, when actually, we may well be the tares, being allowed to live until the harvest. See Matthew 13:30 if not familiar with their plight!

Again, it seems to me, we are experiencing such a waste of potential engagers in these possibly concluding moments of history that we’re all so privileged to witness first hand, and especially so, when we’ve got access to such engaging Kingdom building tools that again, it seems to me, that we are just so often ignoring; and  how can we view it otherwise? We, as His children, do have or will be empoweringly Spirit driven, with the necessary TIME, MONEY, MATERIALS and most importantly, the “HIS MOTIVE” as were the Christ- Follower’s during the first century and again during and after the Reformation.

Yes, indeed, our lives are all about and likely far beyond what we can even imagine, just I (we) are daily Connecting, Healing, & Growing as admonished in Colossians 2:6-7 “So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, CONTINUE to LIVE (not merely exist) your lives in Him, ROOTED and BUILT UP in Him, STRENGTHENED in the FAITH as you were TAUGHT (who am I (we) now teaching, or encouraging?), and OVERFLOWING with THANKFULNESS! (Ouch, not so sure I’m doing much of that while I’m deflecting with His shields’ all this consuming negative chaos?)

 A rather tall order given the Colossians and us! Perhaps we might just need to get out of our routine evening recliners while being nightly mesmerized by all our screens, AND INSTEAD, CHOOSING to RISE UP and Go & Do Now!

HOW EXCELLENT IS HIS NAME IN ALL THE EARTH!! Psalm 8:9

I really like the quote from Matthew Henry; about “it oughta be the business of every day to prepare for our last day.” And many of you, like me, know full well our last days are coming fast, and hasn’t God been so gracious in preparing us oldsters for these transitions; and the many opportunities He gives us YET to continue to LIVE & OVERFLOW WITH THANKFULNESS!!

Day 26

Jesus said, “Whosoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up my Cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whosoever loses their life for me and for the gospel will save it.”

It is not always pleasant to talk about and share with others the things God’s Word says. When I meditate on it, sometimes Scripture makes me uncomfortable. But my comfort is irrelevant. Being a sold-out follower of Christ, standing up for him, and speaking the truth in love, with grace, is what matters.

“If I profess with the loudest voice and clearest exposition of the truth of God except precisely that little point which the world and the devil are at that moment attacking, I am not confessing Christ, however boldly I may be professing Christ.”   Martin Luther

Thanks again Randy Alcorn for being so spot-on. Truth: For A Bigger View of God’s Word. Harvest House 2017 Day 26

For Further Reflection:

Having listened Eric Metaxas’s “Martin Luther: The Man Who Rediscovered God and Changed the World,” I can’t help but wonder the situation in Matin’s life that precipitated the above quote. I do not recall that quote being mentioned, though the book reveals “A resounding boon to Luther studies arrived in recent years via archaeological discoveries in the city of Mansfield where Luther lived from the age of six months until he went off to school in Magdeburg.

Most remarkable, in an excavation begun in 2003, the small and humble house in Mansfield … he was raised in a well-appointed home. The measure of how well can be taken from another (2008) archaeological discovery on the site of that home … bursting with such a dazzling variety of household waste as to constitute a veritable King Tut’s tomb of the late 15^th century quotidian … confirming the idea that this was not the home of a poor or humble people but on the contrary, the home of a very respectable and established leading family of the city.

For example, not less than 7000 animal bones were analyzed, and from these it was determined that 60 % of the Luther family diet was pork … but more revealing yet in this 2008 trove were the objects of kitchen life. A number of Grapen were found. These were the earthen tripod pots put directly into the fire. Some fragments of much rarer metal Grapen pots were discovered too. These were so valuable they are often mentioned in wills from that era.

All very interesting trivia from the books first paragraphs, but I chose to listen the book published by Penguin in 2019, because first, I trust the author’s perspectives, having read his Fish Out of Water, Bonhoeffer, Letter to the American Church; and second, I was seeking any references inferred to the followers of Menno Simons. I found none of consequence while listening to the 20-hour & 38 minute audible version.

Although it is possible, I could have been momentarily distracted while listening on audible (while working), as his quote above infers “every portion of the truth of God except precisely that little point which the world and the devil are at that moment attacking, or exactly in this case, the very point I am seeking a viable connection ….” All, being irrelevant trivia from a personal bunny trail.

So, Randy, my comfort is irrelevant? That is sorta in the same vein as Dr Henry Cloud stating he has an issue with God’s marketing plan in his preface to “Why I Believe.” See the June 26 blog post. Definitely appears we’ll be traveling toward eternity more often than not, on the cold, windy, mountainous route vs the warm fluffy clouds, harps, and beds of ease… Just remember what really matters and that everything here on earth is so very temporary!

All your words are true; all your righteous laws are eternal. Psalm 119:160

Those who believe Scripture are routinely accused of arrogance. Jesus said God’s Word is truth (John 17:17). It’s not arrogance to believe what the Bible teaches. It’s the opposite. Arrogance is when we believe whatever makes us feel better about ourselves or justifies our actions. We pretend we are qualified to judge truth. Then we end up tailoring truth to fit our preferences.

Indeed, we know in our heads we are temporary, but it seems to me, we live in our hearts believing we have plenty of time to prepare for tomorrow. Our head-based opinions may come and go, for months, years, even decades. But God’s truth is eternal, never-changing: “Surely the people are grass. The grass withers, the flower fades, but the word of our God will stand forever” (Isaiah 40:7-8 ESV).

May I suggest we never really know how much we believe anything in our hearts, until its truth or falsehood actually becomes a matter of life and death for us … for only a real risk tests the reality, or validity of our belief.

At the moment, it seems we have a shortage of current practical examples of our beliefs affecting any life and death decisions amongst us, except maybe in the dry dusty annals of the wisdom literature, such as in libraries, or the Bible. And not that the persecuted church hasn’t ample material today; it’s just not in demand and marketable in our church culture, as is say, clean water, which is safe, a necessity, even a right?

Sneaky arrogance? Tailoring truth to preferences? Have we ever been faced with a life or death choice? Not likely, or at least not yet! But I do sadly recall memories as a child and younger man defiantly choosing Sin and its subsequent destruction. And then, as did King David in Psalms 51, sweet forgiveness. Perhaps we need to start over with a simple children’s Bible Story book in the presence of our grandchildren, and read about Moses, Joseph, Daniel in the furnace and the lion’s den , shepherd boy David, etc., through Acts and into I & II Peter, to get a glimpse of His desired reality for us in times of persecution. For how will they know otherwise, unless we tell them?

Thanks to Randy Alcorn’s Truth: A Bigger View of God’s Word. Day 24 Harvest House 2017 for “triggering” the above response…

Likely my all-time favorite author of the past century is Henry Cloud. Several others come close but Cloud’s numerous titles including:

Integrity, How People Grow, Never Go Back, Changes That Heal, Trust, Necessary Endings, Integrity: The Courage to Meet the Demands of Reality, How to Get a Date Worth Keeping, Safe People, It’s Not My Fault, Secrets of Your Family Tree: healing for adult children of dysfunctional families, The Law of Happiness: How Spiritual Wisdom and Modern Science Can Change Your Life, etc.

Now, if you recall prior posts, Dr. Cloud overcame three rather major events. First was a leg bone malformation and he narrowly escaped its amputation at four years of age. Second, he had to give up the first love of his life, that being golf as a college sophomore because of extreme wrist pain. And thirdly, a three-way struggle later during college life for his spiritual identity, as well as choosing both a career and future wife, during which time he endured a mental breakdown prior to his being spiritually mentored / discipled while living with a young Christian couple for six months. Any one of these incidents may have easily derailed his unique gifting.

Truth be told though, it actually was these adversities that prepared him for his niche ministry today, by connecting the spiritual dots, first in his life, and thereafter, in the lives of his readers equipping their hearts and minds to live satisfying and fulfilling lives as well as encourage and teach similarly in their spheres of influence.

Never have I prior invested as much of my time and yours, in one book. I was literally compelled, and I’m not using “compelled” loosely here, for I knew if I presented this book to you in sufficient clarity, that you would, by adding it to your library, and by devouring and sharing its message, and by joining His ambassadors, that we too, can solve the same problem that compelled Dr. Cloud to write this book, Why I Believe, in the first place. As he stated in the preface (see June 24 post), “So my problem is this: I want my friends to know Him and know that He is real. I want them also to have a relationship with Him and know how incredible that is.”

I’ve done as I was compelled. These posts are bathed in prayer to accomplish His purposes. Personally, I prefer preparing 200-300 word reads. This Grand Finale is nearly 2900 words. I’m planning to post it over the next six-seven days in 500-word clips, with little or no fanfare.

Thinking outside the box..

FYI, I personally, have been buying hard copy books just in case the internet ever burps, fades, before ceasing completely … or the lights flicker … before they vanish. And, if they ever do, when absolutely everything gets quiet, the silence may indeed, be not so golden … and oh, just imagine that pervading darkness!  And, with internet disrupted, all our verbal communication, will be, only face to face …

And any notes & documents, must need be handwritten … and, on paper too, unless a rare etch-a-sketch surfaces. Just my lack of humor.  And there will be few, if any, functional screens found anywhere … unless it be by a sporadic yet fueled generator, or some solar derivative … A controlled fire for light, heat & cooking …  will once again, after all these ages, be a valuable resource, even an asset. Just imagine.

Consider, if the grid goes down, and you possessed and could interject a not so simple e-bike with a solar generator and storage batteries into your life’s equation. Surely not likely ever to restore the internet, but it may enhance your Eat-Move-Sleep cycles as detailed by Tom Rath in his E-M-S book, if, you even had a hard copy. For in a not-too-distant time, I could envision MCC Connections or similar thrift stores doubling, tripling, or even beyond, the prices of their used “wisdom books,” depending on the fiat currency, and that being dependent of course, entirely on whether there is a functioning economy of exchange, a society with the operational integrity to insure and maintain Golden Rule order in specific geo-political pockets of humanity while retooling their survival skills in community while continually seeking His guidance and empowerment to proliferate His Fruits of the Spirit as detailed in Galatians 5:22-23. Rather tall dreaming, don’t you think?

Just imagine such a do-over… Or in today’s vernacular, a Start-Up!

It’s time for our thirty-two minute morning stroll with Riley and Angel. But do reflect today on the above. As Jamie Winship says in the preface of his landmark book “Living Fearless: Exchanging the Lies of the World for the Liberating Truth of God, “it’s a good idea to move past all the garbage the world is offering us and into the fully alive, fully human, fully free Holy Spirit offered to us in our relationship with Christ, who is the (everyone’s) way, the (everyone’s) truth, and the (everyone’s) life. Only in Him, can we (everyone) really find transformational faith in our freaked-out world gone amuck.

Remember Nehemiah? Perhaps, it’s time to pull the kid’s Bible Story book off the shelf and get reacquainted?

Nehemiah received the bad news from home (we get plenty of that),

Nehemiah wept, mourned and fasted for days even (not sure that has started yet, least not publicly, perhaps privately),

His sphere of influence detected his long face or depression, (I’m told sadness is not a good demeanor for the King’s cup-bearer to display publicly) and so the king asked Nehemiah why?),

Nehemiah replied honestly from his heart, “Why shouldn’t I be depressed when the city where all my family is buried, is in ruins… Whence the king then asked Nehemiah, “What do you want me to do?”

Notice Nehemiah 2:4 says Nehemiah “praying under his breath to the God-of-Heaven” said “If it please the king and if the king thinks well of me, send me to Judah to the city where my family is buried, so that I can rebuild it” to which in V 6 we read, “The king, with the queen sitting alongside him, said, “How long will your work take and when would expect to return?” I gave him a time, and the king gave his approval to send me.

(7) Then I said, “If it please the king, provide me with letters to the governors across the Euphrates that authorize my travel through to Judah, and also an order to Asaph, keeper of the king’s forest, to supply me with timber for the beams of the Temple fortress, the wall of the city, and the house where I’ll be living.” The generous hand of my God was with me in this and the king gave them to me. (Imagine such boldness occurring today!)

Reading from Nehemiah 4:4 upon encountering hate mail, threats, taunting, and ridicule from their jealous neighbors Nehemiah prayed, “Oh listen to us dear God, we’re so despised: Boomerang their ridicule on their heads; have their enemies cart them off as war trophies to a land of no return; (5) don’t forgive their iniquity, don’t wipe away their sin – they’ve insulted the builders!”

So, I encourage you read the book of Nehemiah. Read their words of repentance and contrition before Almighty God in chapter 8, given not before God intervened, or during their works of repair, but even after the repairs were completed. Read chapter 9 detailing the rise and fall of their kingdom’s communities admitting in verse 37-38 “We’re in deep trouble.” Because of all this we are drawing up a binding pledge, a sealed document written by their leadership team confirming their future loyalty signed by our princes, our Levites, and our Priests, continuing on into chapter 10: 29 “everyone old enough to understand, all joined … in a binding oath to follow the Revelation of God given through Moses …. To keep and carry out all the commandments of God our Master…

The parallels throughout the book of Nehemiah to our July 11, 2024 state of our union with God today and humanity are monumental. The major difference now though, is timing, or the lateness of the hour. Not helped by the fact either, we’re still unknowingly being the proverbial frog in the pot of warm water seeking trivial amusements and comforts as more of the planets are heating up and disintegrating all about us as the globalists agendas proliferate in their attempt to survive what God has predicted.

BOTTOM LINE:

First and foremost, do not despair. As I say and hear inferred more frequently than ever prior, “I may not know the future but each day I’m becoming better acquainted with Creator God who does know all future events and their timelines. All!  

Second, I love the way Nehemiah didn’t merely sit back and disconnect from the doom & gloom news from back home; or throw up his hands spewing all over everyone everywhere “woe is me, it’s all over for us Jews.”

Rather, I encourage you to review the steps Nehemiah took as outlined above from the book of Nehemiah. He received the news (didn’t hide or ignore reality), he obeyed by living in the moment, he prayed quick, he gathered support, he methodically planned his mission being continually aware of the enemies tactics, he adjusted and reassiged resources as needed, and being a conduit of God’s wit & wisdom to the leadership team and beyond, he insured first of all, that everyone involved intimately knew the hope of their mission, followed closely by its stark realities and possible dangers. Nehemiah even had an understanding of how when the task was completed, to involve the people in marking it historically for them going forward while they were celebrating “their good for His Glory! Note the amazing leadership standards he exhibited back then, for such times that are upon us now.

 So again, as you begin to think about your daily living in new ways, perhaps not at all of your choosing, or, at least beyond the usual and customary now, that dominates your weekly and monthly task planning, scheduling and implementing. Perhaps begin by renewing  and broadening your Bible study and prayer times. Engage with others as God directs. Count your blessings, in fact write them down, name them one by one. Read repeatedly and listen in your unproductive moments to the two books mentioned above, or scripture, on audible. Share with others what God is revealing to you while on your unique life preparatory journey. And worship freely & abundantly, talk with God every opportunity you have, and then after those bursts of joyful, or even lamenting or mournful praise; just pull off, curl up, and tune in to His Spirit, just relishing in His Presence, hearing Him confirming your identity and value to His mission. And so, when it’s “too soon time” to retire each evening, end your prayers by adding the old classic “Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep, if I should die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take.” You never know what may transpire while you’re asleep! Which the ever-present (yet anyway) Wikipedia has updated a day ago, the last two lines were exchanged with “in the morn when I awake, please teach me the path of life to take.” Worthy mention indeed.   

FOR FURTHER REFLECTION:

I am reminded of Romans 8:21. “The creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the freedom and glory of the children of God.”

“Let’s not get too settled in, too satisfied with the good things down here on earth. They are only the tinkling sounds of the orchestra warming up. The real song is about to break into a heavenly symphony, and its prelude is only a few minutes away.” Joni Eareckson Tada

Taken verbatim from Heny Clouds 2024 book “Why I Believe” Part II How I came to Believe in Miracles: Do Not Sign It, pages 117-122, 1589 words, plan accordingly.

Many of you readers will identify with the segment below because regardless of your chosen career field and years of service, even the challenging relationships and leadership skills you’ve accessed, (or even now are!)  we too have witnessed these entrepreneurial or managerial moments when we were divinely “carried, lifted, guided, empowered” expanding our efforts exponentially… merlin

Dr. Cloud:

It was at a point in my publishing career where things had taken off, and it was “free agent” time. Like in sports, when you are not tied down to a team anymore, you are free to sign with anyone. In publishing, after finishing a contract, it can be a fun and exciting time as well. All the publishers are coming around and wanting to do the next book or books, and it is a fun time to get together with them and think about next projects.

All of the season of meetings were over, and we had finally reached an agreement, and a good one for several reasons. It was for several books and would give me a clear path for about five years. I liked having the direction set so I could just get to work on writing. We had finalized the negotiation and would be signing in a few days.

I was at home after dinner talking with Tori, and my phone rang. It was a woman with whom I served on a board with and only saw a couple of times a year. I knew her, but not that well, and she certainly was not current on anything I was up to or working on. She knew nothing about my work with publishers.

“Hey, Shelly. How are you?” I asked.

“I’m good,” she said. “But I had a vision about you.”

“What?” I asked. “Really? Tell me.” This was not a normal occurrence for me. I was pretty new to the world of people having visions at that time.

“Well, it was very clear. I saw you in a yard, and you were talking to people in the yard, and there was a fence around all of you. Like a fenced in yard. And then the Lord said this: ‘You have been speaking to people in the yard, and he wants to remove the fence so you can speak to people outside the yard.’ And he says that you are about to sign some contract … I think it is about a book project or something … and he says if you sign it, it will keep you in that yard. So don’t sign it.”

Oh my … I was so certain things were going so well and my immediate future had so much clarity. And now this …

“So, Shelly … Are you sure? … This is from Him?” I always tend to ask that when I get people who have “messages from God.” There are a lot of kooks out there, and I rarely believe them. But this one … this had too much credibility in both the message and the messenger. It was so specific … and I knew exactly what it meant, too.

The deal was with a Christian publisher. And no matter what the title or subject of a book, if the publisher is Christian, retailers often will tend to bury it in the religious section of the bookstores (which actually existed at the time, before Amazon and online book buying). And the marketing would be mostly to the Christian world … and what that meant was clear in the vision: the people in the yard. God was telling me that He wanted me to talk to people outside the Christian world, outside the yard, and He was going to move the fence. How in the world would she ever know that I was (a) about to sign a book deal, and (b) one that would keep me talking to a certain closed group?

Another reason I also knew that this was real was that for about 18 months, when I would out on my patio to pray, I would hear a voice in my head say, I am taking you out the ministry. That is all it said, and it was clear. But I did not know what all that meant, other than for me, it did mean something very specific.” I was supposed to begin working outside the “Christian” world of audiences that I was speaking and writing too. To me, at that point, “ministry “meant Christian audiences, which back then, was most of what I did. And what I would discover soon was the message from that voice also meant much more about my publishing, leadership consulting work, business speaking, and media.

“Yes, I am sure,” she said. “It was from God. It was clear.”

I hung up bummed. Everything had looked so good, and now I knew I had to walk away from so much that was secure. But, as I learned way back in leaving Dallas, when God says “Go,” you do it, and you leave security behind. He will provide the next place to land. So, I walked away from the deal.

I won’t bore you with the details, but the publisher was dumbfounded and could not believe we were not going through with it. It made no sense … unless you were on that phone call. And then, it was confirmed.

Soon thereafter, Time Life called with an offer to do a book with a national secular media campaign they were doing with a music offering that would take the message way, way past the Christian audience I had been speaking to up to that point. So, John Townsend and I wrote a book for them called God Will Make a Way, and the beginning of talking to people outside the yard had begun. Now that “fence” was beginning to be removed.

But there was much more to come. And this was the real fulfillment of the next stage of the vision. Now that I was free to publish “outside-the-yard,” God (through some other God-directed clear steps, some “random” circumstances), put me with an outside-the-yard publishing agent who wanted to do my first secular business book and take it to a New York publisher, which would full-blown be outside the yard. And I would be writing to businesses without the Christian language in the book, which would mean that they could now use the principles in their public companies and secular businesses. I had always worked in the secular business world, doing leadership consulting, but all my books up to that point had Christian content in them, and most companies didn’t want to offend people with that and would not use my books. This step was fulfilling the voice I heard on my patio about God taking me outside the Christian world, as well as the vision about talking to people “outside the yard.” It was all coming true, exactly like both the voice and the vision had said.

We went to New York, signed a deal, and published a leadership book that showed the principles that I had been using with leaders that I had been using for a long time but had no Bible verses in it to scare people off. Cleanly outside the yard. (It is weird … if you say “It is good to be honest” in a book, people love it and think you’re smart. But if you say “The Bible says it good to be honest,” you get cancelled, and they think you are “one of those” religious kooks. So, I didn’t use any Bible verses in the book at all; I just shared the business leadership principles that I use in the companies I work with. And at various times, they would lead to some great conversations about why I believe.

Well, things happened, as the vision had said. The New York Times reviewed the book (it was called Integrity) and called it “the best book

of the bunch” in the leadership books they were reviewing. That turned it into the launch of a new direction for my writing and a new audience … the secular business world. Although I have done CEO coaching and leadership consulting for twenty years at that point with many secular and public companies and had built and run my businesses, my brand in publishing had always been pigeonholed in the Christian yard. God took me out of that for His reasons and supernaturally directed me to do it through the vision and the “voice” I heard. Had he not, I would still be “in the yard,” and I would have missed so many great opportunities to meet and work with so many people who don’t hang out in that yard, for purposes that were His.

He does guide us … even when we think we know what we want and need to do. He closes some doors that we desperately desire, for other reasons we might not understand. Just like I thought I wanted to follow my golf dreams or continue down my publishing track as it has been unfolding, God wanted something different and better. Again, the proverb rang true:

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight. (Proverbs3:5-6)

It was a horrible day, one that directed and limited my life for many years after, and was the source of a lot of pain.

            I was in the 7^th or 8^th grade, and it was the day for oral book reports. I usually like that day, as I enjoyed hearing everyone and also sharing in front of the group myself. I liked public speaking. So, nothing new.

            But for some reason, this time, about a third of the way into it, I got flustered. I began stammering and stuttering, and it only got worse. I could not recover for some reason, and found it hard to go on. I just got further and further kind of unable to get the words out. Kinda paralyzed in front of the room.

            Then the teacher stood up and said, “Just sit down. This is terrible,” or something pretty close to that. She then went on to kind of berate me with things like “You will never be able to be a success in anything if you can’t do public speaking. And you can just forget ever being a lawyer [one of my possible career dreams at that time], because lawyers have to talk in front of people.”

            Needless to say, I was devastated. Ashamed and rejected, I just slithered to my seat and tried to disappear.

            From there, it went downhill as far as public speaking was concerned. I had no trouble with a few friends, like at a table or a few friends.. But any time the group got to be any size at all, I just literally could not speak. Not “wouldn’t,” but “couldn’t.” So, I didn’t.

            I went all through high school and college avoiding any kind of public speaking at all. I would always refuse it. Even asking questions in class became a real difficult thing to do and to hide my problem, I rarely even did that. In high school, my parents sent me to a counselor to cure the problem, but it did not help. And to make sure you understand, it was not just a fear. It was “I literally can’t do it.” Period. I couldn’t talk. In fact, it was so bad that I almost flunked 12^th grade English, because there was an oral book report requirement and I was ready to tell the teacher “Well, flunk me.” And I had been recruited to play college golf … ready to lose it all because my inability to go through with it. In graduate school, I pretty much continued to avoid any public speaking, other than in class for a question or a small discussion.

So, roll the clock forward to my mid to later twenties, I had been in practice for a few years and was building a lot of models of psychological and leadership growth and working with companies and organizations. As a result of all that activity, I was continually being asked to speak for the organizations, businesses, churches, and the like. And … I always refused. One hundred percent.

            When asked, I would just say, “No, that’s just not something I do.” And let it go. No way was I ever going to stand up in front of a group again. I went about my private clinical and consulting practice, and that was enough for me. Small meetings around a table were okay, but nothing larger.

            Then one day, I was at the gym and headed to the showers when this big  guy walked up to me. He was huge. (Actually, he had played NFL football for the LA Rams.) I was wondering what he wanted when he looked at me and asked, “Are you a Christian?”

            That seemed weird …a big guy in the gym showers walking up to me asking if I am a Christian.

            “Uh … yeah.” I answered.

            “Well, God just told me to tell you something,“ he said.

            My first thought was “Well, I am also a psychologist, and I can make those voices go away.” But I didn’t say that.” I just replied, “What?”

            “Yes, that’s right. Don’t worry, I am not a weirdo. I am a pastor. And God just clearly spoke to me about you,” he explained. He told me then he was pastor at the Newport Vineyard Church, a good place that I was familiar with. So I agreed to talk to him.

            We went next door to a restaurant and sat down, and this is what he said: “God said when you were a kid, something bad happened to you that has made you afraid to speak in front of people ever since. But He wants you to begin speaking for Him, and He is going to open some doors. You are to walk through them.”

            I was stunned. How in the ….? What? That was all I could muster. We talked some more before I left there and returned to my office. I just sat there literally in shock, amazed at how real and present God is all the time. And once again, how long I had suffered with that problem … and yet He had been there all along. Aware, loving me, but doing nothing about it.

            Until now.

            In high school, when I was struggling with it, I prayed a lot for God to help me, and He never did. But now, it seemed like He was stepping up. There was no way I could deny what just happened. That guy did not know me from Adam, nor what I did, nor anything about my problem or where it had come from.

            The next week or so, I got two calls to speak to public groups. (“He is going to open some doors for you to speak and you are to walk through them.”) The first one was a Presbyterian pastor gathering with about fifty pastors. That would have been far more than I would have formerly agreed to and been able to do. But this time, I literally felt like I had no choice. Zero chance that I was not going to do it, no matter how scared I was. God had entered my space and told me to do it … and I could not run and hide. I was afraid I’d get swallowed by a whale if I did. I was way more afraid of how real and alive He was than whatever could happen if I melted down while speaking.

            So, I asked a good friend of mine who prays for me, and also is a speech therapist, to come with me for support. She sat on the front row, and I stumbled my way through it. Barely. I don’t remember if they even liked it or not, but at least I’d gotten through the first test without passing out.

            From there on, it was more and more practice as more “doors” began to mysteriously appear, out of nowhere. I was petrified each and every time, but gradually, I got more and more comfortable. It took about a year or so to feel more comfortable. Then, I was offered a radio show and was suddenly talking to a lot of people. Before then, there would have been no way.

            That was decades ago … since then I have spoken thousands of times. And now, I actually enjoy it, and though I sometimes get a little helpful dose of “butterflies” before going up, I do not have any fear of going up. God has healed that, this time through showing up through a pastor in a gym shower and telling me to do it, so then a natural process psychologists call “desensitization” and “exposure” prevails. It is the gradual facing into what you fear, that the brain slowly learns the 7^th grade teacher is no longer there.

            In fact, as I write this, I just came back from speaking at a global leadership event that had hundreds of thousands of live attendees in arenas and auditoriums all over the world. And it was actually fun. As a psychologist, I believe the slow healing came through natural processes.

BOTTOM LINE:

There is absolutely no doubt in my mind that the impetus to get me into that process was supernatural. How else can you explain it? Who can begin to know where and how He is going to speak in your life, or anyone’s life? Are we not to pray openly, candidly, continually, submitting…

NEXT UP:

Tomorrow after tonight’s potential debating debacle, Billie Graham’s grandson will reappear with his well chosen words inspired by Mark Chapter Seven. Time for a break from the intensity of the Cloud! Loretta and I are at page 144 of 257 in Dr. Henry Cloud’s audible book “Why I Believe,” a book packed with such relevant impactful life stories confirming the wisdom he shares to guide and inspire our daily faith journey’s. Change your life and the lives of those in your pond’s ripples (circle of influence) by ordering several “Why I Believe” and loan them out. Less than $20 each at Amazon. I guarantee you’ll have your “loan to” list well started before you’ve read even half of the book.

Nearly every day I come across ideas and scriptures that are added to my file of dozens of ideas waiting in the wings for His anointing and development, such as the above! Blessings on your journey home. Read the signs. Listen to the compelling sounds! Stay the course. No excuses!

World-renowned psychologist and leadership expert Henry Cloud has impacted millions of lives through his groundbreaking books and his work coaching leaders of the most influential organizations in the world. But few people know the details of his own story and how he become one of the most beloved and respected psychologists and faith influencers in America.

In this indelibly personal and vulnerable book, Dr. Cloud leads us through his early struggles with illness and depression and the miracles that healed him and led him to his calling as a healer of others. Through masterful storytelling combined with a deeply nuanced understanding of the human mind, Dr. Cloud invites readers to inhabit the spaces of suffering and elation that make us most human and to walk alongside of him as he ponders the great questions we are so often afraid to ask, but which give our lives fulfilling meaning.  

Introduction

One night, as a ten-year-old at camp in North Carolina, I felt a pain and stirring in my soul that has never gone away. The night had been a regular camp night … with counselors and cabin mates at the big bonfire … doing camp-like things. One of them I do remember being a bit unusual … we ate a rattlesnake that some crazy counselor had killed, but other than that, just normal stuff, along with some kind of “devotional” time. It was a “lightly” Christian camp, but not an in-your-face overbearing type of religious camp. Mainly it was a sports and wildlife experience for four weeks of fun and some attempt by the counselors at spiritual and character development of who knows what kinds of kids had been sent there by parents wanting either a break or a better version of their kid. My parents probably hoped for both.

That week had been one of a difficult-to-explain heightening of my love for God. I had always had a strong consciousness of God from early childhood … I somehow knew He was there. He showed Himself to me ways I couldn’t really explain … I just knew when I felt His presence and that it was real. But this particular camp experience that week led me to a little mountainside chapel as I was out for a hike, where I had an experience that I remember as if it were yesterday. I was tromping around in the Blue Ridge Mountains of North Carolina and suddenly felt drawn into that little building. As I sat there in silence, I was overcome with a movement in my heart. I felt Him drawing me to Him … it was kind of overwhelming, in a good way. The love was so strong that I felt for Him. As I sat there, I told Him that I would do whatever He wanted me to do with my life. I had been moved by an Invisible Force that I knew was real and loving. I was sure of that.

Which brought me to that night … I had it before, the “gospel” message that was conveyed, that God loved all of us and Jesus had died to pay the penalty for everything we had ever done wrong, securing forgiveness for any of us for all time. I had believed it before as a child but probably didn’t understand it as well as I did that night. For some reason, this time it pierced more deeply.

I don’t remember all of the details of the message, but I vividly remember the gist. The counselor said that the gospel was a simple message that was like this: Think of if you committed a crime, and went to court, and were found guilty by the judge. You are standing in front of the bench, and he pronounces the verdict: guilty as charged. And then he pronounces the penalty, the fine. You know that you cannot pay it or endure it, but it stands as true and real. You are guilty and you are convicted. You must pay the fine. And you also realize that you cannot afford the price.

Then right at that moment, the judge says, “I will come down from the bench and stand in your place and pay the fine for you if you want me to. You may go free if you accept my offer.” The counselor then said, “That is what Jesus did for us. He paid our fine, and if we accept His payment, his death on the cross for us, we can go free and be pronounced ‘not guilty.”’ We can be forever forgiven by God for everything we have ever done, or ever will do. It has been paid for, if we accept it.

Somehow the simplicity of that moved me in a different way than it ever before. I realized that the love that I had felt from God was from a loving Father, not mad at me for being “bad,” and not ready to zap me for any mistake. It came together in a much deeper way.

So, with all that good news, why the pain that night?

I felt the pain of knowing that my best friend did not know God … did not know that there was Someone who loved him this much and that he would have a relationship with … and I wanted him to know it, too. But I felt squeamish about how to tell him. After all, we were more concerned with being cool and tough and winning games and trophies than being one of those weird religious types. So, I had never talked to him about it. And that night, I cried with my counselor in front of the fireplace back in at the lodge. I needed to know how to get out of this dilemma … the dilemma of carrying around such an incredible Reality that I knew he would want to know, and at the same time being too afraid to talk about it.

Well, since that time, a lot has happened. A lot. And I have seen way, way more of how real God is, and what He can do. And this book is my attempt to put my journey with God into words … for one purpose: I want my friends to know that God is real. And although I have discussed God with many of my friends since that time, I want to write it all down for them and others I have not talked to, in one place: “You might think I’m crazy, but this is why I believe, and why I want you to have a relationship with Him, too.” And before you read on, I can pretty much guarantee that you will find some of it to sound very crazy. But it is all true.

There are a lot of obstacles to faith. I had them myself after I decided to get more serious about my faith later in life, so I it is easy to for me to understand when others have those questions. I had to struggle with finding answers that satisfied me, because I could not be a believer and put my brain in a lockbox in order to do that. So, the first purpose of this book is to share with you my story of God’s reality in my life, and the second is to share how those hard questions were resolved in my own soul and brain. I want to share the answers I found that put it all to rest.

Life has so many dilemmas that make it so hard to believe in a good God at times, and the people who sell the God message can sometimes be so weird and crazy and obnoxious that we just feel like “If this faith were true, then all of that crap would not exist that surrounds it, and Christians would not be so undesirable and such a turn-off.” As I used to think when I was kid, “I like God; I just don’t like His friends.”

Of course, not all Christians are “that kind.” So, many are awesome people who do truly incredible things. They give of their time, talents, and resources to make the world a much better place, alleviating poverty, suffering, and much more. And they are people of stellar character. I know this to be true over and over, all around the world. But as I talk to people who do not share my faith, the experiences that they have had with some believers are often a big part of the obstacle to God. But the fascinating thing I have found is this: the religious people that you and I both struggle with and can’t stand are the same ones Jesus didn’t get along with, either. I will show you what He actually says about certain types of judgmental, narrow-minded, narcissistic, and controlling religious types. I will hopefully help you discover something I learned …that “they” are not what He or the faith is about at all, and those people often do exactly the opposite of what He told us to do, even doing those things “in His name.”

More about that later.

So, come along with me as I share my experience, my questions, and the answers that I have found that have satisfied my doubts. One disclaimer: I do not mean that my answers are even the best ones out there; they are only my heartfelt attempt to tell my own story about how they got answered for me. They come from many areas of science, and other fields, and as I studied those disciplines, I discovered something. There are brilliant people on both sides of faith and non-faith, and it told me that intelligence, IQ, science, philosophy or any other discipline is not standing in the way of whether or not someone believes. But for someone who does believe, the science supports faith, and as I will share with you, many of the most brilliant physicists, biologists, astronomers, and others who attest to that.

So, let’s hop in. First my journey to faith and its experiences, and then how some tough questions got answered.

NEXT UP:

Not at all sure. Loretta gave me this book for Father’s Day and we in a few minutes will begin chapter six on Audible as we walk our dogs on the exquisite Gerber Homestead Trail 1.25 mile twice daily trek. Both the trail and the book are an absolute delight. We are blessed!

“By Him let us continually offer the sacrifice of praise to God, that is, the fruit of our lips, giving thanks to His name” (Hebrews 13:15).

In the month that lies before you, you’ll have countless opportunities for sacrifice. Think of that person at work whom you struggle to love. What if you visualize yourself placing that relationship upon the altar as an offering of praise to God?

Your marriage needs to be offered up as a sacrifice every day. So does the way you spend your free time. If you begin to make a list of the things you could offer up in sacrifice, you might never stop writing. The truth, you see, is that when your life becomes a temple, a home for Jesus, you begin to see His face in the face of all those who surround you. You begin to treat them as you would treat Him. You begin to realize that all ground is holy ground, because God is there. You begin to see every situation as a potential act of worship, a time to magnify the name of the Lord.

Earlier this week I sat supposedly to read in the fast-food break area at Cosco’s over noontime while Loretta was shopping. Soon, most of the seats were taken. I then became preoccupied with which gentleman or couple might allow me to join them so my 4 seats would be open for others, but then the rush was over and empty seats prevailed.

But not before I found people watching much more captivating than even a favorite book. I was reminded of Jesus in Matthew 23:37 when he said while looking over Jerusalem, “How I wish I could gather your children together as a hen gathers her brood under her wings.” The exiting shoppers possessed a variety of facial expressions, demeanor, health challenges, language, actions, quite revealing interactions with presumably their spouse, or children, etc., all of which provided an abundance of character clues possibly to be developed into imaginary captivating short stories; all from a 20-30 second quick study on this holy ground, as they exited the fastest check-out counters I’ve ever witnessed.

Notice though, I didn’t mention any spiritual evaluations. But actually, don’t we Christ-Followers, actually begin with that first? For me at least, compared to ten years ago, today “the image of Jesus weeping over Jerusalem and the mother hen and her chicks,” is now front & center, especially when I’m out in public, sometimes even in church. But please don’t take that personal, for as you should realize by now, I have a vivid memory of past events, though not always of last week.  And though I struggle now just remembering names, make no mistake, 46 years ago while I was sitting in the east balcony contemplating my miserable lack of joy and peace while listening to Pastor Bill invite all of us home under God’s protective and empowering “abiding,” make no mistake, my SHELTER was SCARCE in a congregation of abundance! Ask me about my journey if you’re curious; I’ve got nothing to hide. After all, it is His-Story.

Again, please consider this Solitude-Service-Struggle cause or effect situation to gain Shelter during the coming chaos. And then ultimately, the ONE that encapsulates them all: SACRIFICE. Worship in the midst of these six S words! And when that happens, be prepared to throw open the doors of your life, sharing your overflowing well of joy and peace.

BOTTOM LINE:

The world is waiting to see the person you will become when you live every moment in the wonder of worship!

Prompted from David Jeremiah’s 2002 devotional Sanctuary: Finding Moments of Refuge in the Presence of God June 20.