Scott Peck, in “The Road Less Traveled,” began by saying, “Life is difficult” followed by “Once we truly know that life is difficult – once we truly understand and accept it, then life is no longer difficult. Because once it is accepted, the fact life is difficult no longer matters.”
Yes, once again I am cruising about in Dr Henry Cloud’s book, “Integrity: The Courage to Meet the Demands of Reality” where on page 172 he states this phenomena. “If you orient yourself to the reality that nothing good is going to happen if you can’t first deal with the bad things that are going to happen, then you are ready to have something good happen. Once you understand that principle, you are in the program.” Relax, I read this several times too before I finally understood it. I believe this principle is bedrock in order to achieve your life’s productivity in all dimensions…. merlin)
Continuing in that vein, Cloud states “ But if you can’t orient yourself to that reality, nothing good is going to happen, because that reality will not go away. It is still the nature of the universe regardless of the frenzy of today’s pop culture’s rhetoric or consuming narrative. It is true that in your business life, personal goals, and relationships, you will encounter problems. Period. If you are not prepared to meet them and resolve them, then they will be the end of your hopes for making anything work, either personally or professionally.” (or even spiritually if you are fortunate enough to possess that dimension.. merlin)
Dr. Cloud on page 173 told while attending an Easter gathering, a friend, a CEO of a company, shared that he was about to hit a rough spot. In order to clear the deck before he left on a long trip later in the month, he had scheduled some difficult conversations surrounding relational issues for the next week that he needed to face into. He admitted it could get pretty tough.
Picking up on face into, Dr Cloud had also heard the CEO earlier use the words lean into. I have learned over the years, passive people such as myself, for example, tend to talk about events in such a way that removes us as “actors”, and instead, we view ourselves as being “acted upon,” and not the cause of what has occurred. In other words, “I ended up here” as opposed to “I chose to be here.”
Personally this “ending up” reminds me of when in life I’ve been tempted to adopt the popular victim-hood mentality. Fortunately, I never could allow myself to adopt that crutch though I’m not entirely sure why. Was it because my parents and community positively modeled free enterprise and opportunity so strongly and effectively as opposed to godless communism /socialism, even though our Minnesota county was statistically as impoverished as Appalachia during the sixties?
Or was it because of my spiritual heritage? Raised in a very conservative faith theologically, I was taught that although I was endowed with seeds of greatness, my future spiritual success (material success was always secondary) was visually portrayed as the narrow way vs. the broad way, so early on in life, I was trained to evaluate my life decisions in this very simple easy to grasp spiritual dimension. In other words, my outcomes were my choice. Understand I never felt manipulated or coerced, just loved. But I waas aware God had a plan for my life and I was looking forward to making his plan happen. And therein, was my biggest problem. Naively I was determined to make it happen regardless, even if it were my own version on the narrow way! Big mistake! Pity my folks as they endured their eldest marking the days off on the calendar from twelve months out until I packed up my few bags, got on my motorcycle and drove off to Hesston Kansas to begin college.
I still remember well as a high school junior driving home in our family’s ’58 black 4 door Chev together with my girlfriend Pam, my parents and two younger siblings, after we had attended our high school’s Friday evening Class Night event, the week prior commencement. Later Pam commented as I was driving her home, how she had observed during that 20 minute ride how much my parents loved each other. Later, I recalled thinking that was really strange for her to say, and especially so since she was in the front seat beside me sitting directly ahead of them and unable to comfortably even see them. I just now realized perhaps she was able to observe them in the rear view mirror. But now years later, I realize perhaps the stark contrast that was so readily apparent to her, was obscured to me as I’d not yet experienced negative family relationships in the painful dimensions as had Pam and many of my peers.
Likewise, I now understand how this CEO deliberately chose problems as issues to face and lean toward, not away from. And to think, he even scheduled the events to repair the situations, as opposed to passive persons like me, merely waiting for it to happen, blow over or even worse, for me to actively avoid it and even run from it. Apparently, the CEO preferred to deal with issues promptly, actively, and directly. Plus, he wanted to make sure the problem was fully resolved before his later trip avoiding from having it linger and causing any more damage than it had already inflicted throughout his kingdom.
Dr. Cloud goes on to say this was just the way this successful CEO lived all of his life. He did not avoid his problems, whether personally or in his business. He was rewarded in his career for his integrity and values-driven business and has grown a company based on promptly addressing customers’ problems and solving their issues in ways that leaves them better off than before the problem occurred. He has also been chosen by governments to do business in special projects that others were denied because of his reputation as a “fix what is wrong with integrity” kind of person.
In his cloud of witnesses he has left many satisfied partners, customers, employees, and others, as well as revenues in the billions. He epitomized “no problems, no profit” in the way of “face problems and become very profitable,” both in relationships and financially. And again, for the person ‘in Christ’ facing in and leaning in as this CEO aptly demonstrated, though I am not at all privy to his spirituality, imagine with me if such an insightful businessman were also under the umbrella of the Holy Spirit, I dare say the world has yet to see what could be accomplished by such a personality if he/she was so loyal in their obedience to God.
To summarize, I propose profits are earned by conquering problems best viewed as opportunities sought. Therefore, facing, embracing and solving problems are our mandate for a fulfilled life and not to be avoided. (merlin 03/29/21)
May I offer the rough analogy of going to a dentist to repair a tooth as a challenge that you usually can’t wait to get fixed; either to eat comfortably again or sleep through the night. But that is only true if your past experiences with dentists have been good and has led to resolution of pain without much trauma.
But, and this is a big but, if your past experience with dentists has been traumatic, and painful, you may have a dentist phobia, and you will avoid going. So, your avoidance keeps the pain intact and you by not facing the problem, will not experience the “profit” of getting it fixed. It is critically important we face the demands of our realities having the character and integrity to do so, based on either our prior experiences or our observation’s of others.
As a result of their character abilities, successful people face into embracing problems and their accompanying negative realities. Their internal equipment allows them to do this. And a portion of this equipment is this mind-set and attitude that facing the bummer music sooner rather than later, will be better for them in the end.
For example, Dr. Cloud said he is frequently amazed at how talented and competent individuals will allow their careers and relationships to be stalled out, disrupted, or even destroyed by avoiding the negative realities that make them uncomfortable. Actually, this overt denial of how bad the situation really is, becomes quite interesting and closer to home for many of us, when we get into the underlying issues, whether it be in business, academia, church or family.
For example, consider the wife who won’t confront her husband’s addictions, temper, selfishness, etc. or the husband who won’t confront his wife’s control issues, spending, various obsessions, etc., or vice versa. To do that would mean really getting out of our comfort zones and putting our arms around the problem in a full embrace …. And that usually means being much too vulnerable for our comfort!
We began this post with the quote from Peck saying, “Life is difficult” and oh, how well we each can echo that after the past year! Never did we anticipate the unfolding of history as we have witnessed it to date nor are we alone in our current uncertainty for we are reminded the last Tuesday Christ was on earth prior to his crucifixion, a similar cloud of pending chaos was descending on Jerusalem.
Actually, if you read the suggested reading for yesterday from Matthew 24:1- 25:46 you will be reminded of the numerous times during our year of confusion and lawlessness that we have heard these poignant scriptures referenced frequently in vivid detail to substantiate our town crier’s message in our increasingly oppressive current events. As then, Christ, who only needed to obey his Father, whereas everyone else from Pilate on down to the responsive thief on his cross, all had or have the same question demanding an answer from us, “What will you do with Jesus?”
Certainly, your answer can wait indefinitely today but at your own peril. Realize waiting ( or procrastinating) for the facts and confirmation from science is not without a price, and statistically, those lives left in the balance are often trashed. The roaring lion is good at his game. Without the Spirit , we tend to become a lost cause!
And, actually, if the history (which really is His story) and the facts and the science are all examined under the untainted criteria of true science as authored by God in His infinite wisdom exhibited not only on this micro planet we call earth but throughout the galaxies, one must conclude as stated, “In the beginning, God.”
So, as we “in-Christ” prevail until that day, consider the triumph proclaimed in the Easter message when “His blood spilled for us” broke the bondage of Sin once and for all, and demoted Satan to be a defeated foe until his final destruction. Likewise, until God destroys this earth, good will trump evil, life will trump death, love will trump hate, and God’s justice will ultimately be served.
I suggest in celebration we consider the flooding value of forgiveness just sweeping over us! Of restitution coming instantly! Followed by restoration… And on all fronts … Even for the years the locusts have eaten! Now, add in total peace, love, and joy into the mix.>>>> Happy Easter!
Blessings on your journey home through the darkness of Good Friday and then bursting into His glorious light on Resurrection Sunday morning! Live in the Victory we’ve been given>>>>> merlin