My apologies for my AM/PM typo yesterday. I typed 12:05 PM rather AM; hence the posts were 12 hours later than usual… merlin
Chapter Twelve: Take A Break for Relationships
When Bank of America first set up its call centers, it deliberately designed them for maximum efficiency in handling customer calls. Employees’ breaks were timed so they didn’t coincide with any of their peers’ breaks. The intent was to ensure that the phone lines were always covered. Yet employee turnover was unacceptably high.
When the bank’s leaders looked into the retention issue, they discovered that a lack of relationships and daily communication was the root of the problem. This lack of cohesion was six times more predictive of performance than any other metric. Because of these findings, the bank’s leaders changed the shift schedules to ensure that groups of employees could have lunch and take breaks at the same time. Three months later, the same group of employees was handling calls 23 percent faster, and group cohesion had gone up 18 percent. These increases translated into $15 million in added revenue for the company.
Recent experiments suggest the best way to produce sustainable increases in well-being is to appreciate what you already possess and to continue creating new positive experiences with the people who matter most. When you value what you already have, not only will you grow, you won’t feel the angst of wanting more. Any time you create experiences in the context of your existing resources and relationships, it has a compounding effect om your well-being.
Use Your Phone When You’re Alone
Paying attention requires a little effort, but the rewards are great. Nothing adds more value to life than close social relationships. This why it is important to focus on the people you are with when you are with them! There are countless distractions around you. When I’m stuck in a long line at a grocery store or the BMV, my digital pacifier (phone) is remarkably useful. Having the internet in my pocket converts those boring and frustrating moments into an opportunity to research a recent topic of interest, or to text a friend. However, these distractions create problems when you use them while spending time with friends, colleagues, or loved ones.
FYI, other studies noted anytime a cell phone was visible, the quality of conversation was less fulfilling and people reported having higher levels of empathetic concern. Often simply seeing a cellphone is bad for my concentration, for others in the room, and the quality of my relationships. Giving your undivided attention to others tells them how much you value their thoughts, opinions, and time. Intently listening to what another person is saying is a great way to forge new relationships and invest in your existing friendships. Unfortunately, most of the time when people are talking to you, you are not truly listening. You may think you are good at faking listening, but chances are, you’re not. People read facial expressions in a matter of milliseconds. So when you’re not paying full attention, other people can tell subconsciously, even if they don’t say anything about it.
BOTTOM LINE: When you chose to have dedicated time with another person, such as dining, driving somewhere, or going on a walk, give that person your undivided attention. Talking on your phone, using apps, or reading a message tells others you don’t value their time as much as you could. You chose to be with them, so make it count!
DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:
How can you build more in-person social time into your work?
Which friends and family members improve your health and well-being when you spend time with them?
RECAP: Social networks that we often take for granted profoundly shape our lives.
What is one practical step you could take to pay attention to other people better when you are together?
How will they know they have your full and undivided attention?
NEXT UP: ASAP, Realize Our Ultimate Strength Is FINDING & DEVELOPING Talent in Others.