Whence The Courage To "Get Comfortable Being Uncomfortable?"

My reading of late is becoming much more diverse and I am trying to provide you all a wider variety of topics that I think may be relevant for you. The heart of this post, possessing courage, impressed me months ago and tonight I saw it and decided to write about it. Perhaps Carl’s second advent message (Light replacing Darkness) and some of our Sunday School conversation afterwards prompted this composition.  

I would have done well to have applied this post’s principle of courage to my life even as a teenager. I was not an individual as a lad whom exhibited outstanding personal courage for my beliefs and convictions. In fact, I would say I’ve been a whimp for most of my life steering clear of controversy becoming abnormally quiet whenever the conversation turned controversial, or perhaps I’d just steer the conversation in another direction.

This being “whimpy” resulted for all the years I battled an inferiority complex (IC) and that may surprise you, but believe me, I earned that IC. It certainly was not inherited, or afflicted upon me, or by being raised in a cultural subset, or because of being in any form a victim of undesirable circumstances. No, my IC was the direct result of specific decisions I made  during my younger formative years when I clearly chose thought patterns, behaviors and activities that were in direct opposition to the promptings I initially received from my conscience. In time, the conscience’s wisdom diminished and my rational mind provided me an “adjusted truth” and I “functioned.” But, I never “flourished” because of that pesky IC!

Until just recently, that is! And my journey to my “freedom to flourish” is not relevant to this post just now, at least. What is relevant is that I made a decision to acknowledge my Essential Purpose (EP) in life. And you may be surprised to know that as a young lad by fourth grade I knew my EP and celebrated the  freedom it afforded me, before I succumbed to the thought patterns, behaviors and activities that destroyed my peace as spoke of by the rich man in the prior post.

I maintain regardless of your walk in life and your responsibilities at the moment, we all can benefit from a good dose of courage, courage for whatever challenge or situation we may be facing. Hopefully, you’ve not been incapacitated as long as I chose my bondage. Actually, Christmas and Easter exist to terminate IC’s, especially when you acknowledge your EP. Funny then, how courage will prevail naturally.

What follows are some paragraphs from Matthew Kelly’s business management primer “The Culture Solution” applicable to all of us whether in business, education, parenting, etc. driving home the point that once you understand your EP, managerial courage at whatever level you intersect it “is getting comfortable being uncomfortable.”    

Managerial courage is essential to a coaching culture, and coaching is essential to a dynamic culture. It all ties together and is essential to long-term success.

The secret to establishing this kind of culture and developing managerial courage is something that I have hinted at a few times throughout the book. It is one of the most important lessons I have learned in my career. I was familiar with the idea, but it never had really clicked with me. It was an HR leader who finally got it through my very thick skull.

I was in the boardroom with the leadership team of a very successful nonprofit that was experiencing massive growth, and a difficult decision needed to be made. There was George Josten, a 29-year-old HR professional. I don’t use that word, professional, lightly. He is a consummate professional. George was there to answer any HR related questions the leadership team might have as they worked their way through the problem at hand.

Conversation rambled around the room, moving from salient points that need to be considered to a clear discomfort with the decision that everyone knew needed to be made and acted upon expediently.

I turned to George, who is always the quiet observer, taking in all the data and other people’s perspectives before offering his thoughts, and asked, “What are your thoughts?”

“It seems that some of you are trying to get comfortable with this. The thing I would say is that you are probably never going to get comfortable with it, but don’t forget, he has put you in this situation. You hired him to do something very specific, which he said he could do, and he has failed to do it. Now you need to let him go, and you are trying to get comfortable with that. You are not supposed to be comfortable with some of the stuff. Your discomfort points to an emotional intelligence that probably makes you very, very good at serving this organization. The goal here is to make the right decision. The goal is not to get comfortable. You are a relatively new leadership team and these things are going to come up from time to time. They do even in the best organizations. You have to get comfortable being uncomfortable.“

Wow. I just sat there. Twenty-nine years old. “You have to get comfortable being uncomfortable.” Brilliant. Powerful and practical. On one hand he told them it’s OK to be uncomfortable and you should be. But at the same time, you have to be OK with being uncomfortable and do what needs to be done.

It was one of the best moments on a team ever. I talk about it all the time. If you want to be a good leader, coach, parent, spouse, friend, and so on, the faster you get comfortable being uncomfortable, the better.

Managerial courage just might be the art of getting comfortable being uncomfortable. What I am certain of is this; if we want to build a Dynamic Culture in our business, our church, our families, with our spouse, we all need to get comfortable being uncomfortable. A Culture Advocate celebrates mission as king even when it is uncomfortable.

Merlin here now, and don’t forget, discovering your EP is the precursor to enhancing your Courage to grow your Dynamic Culture as a Culture Advocate, whether in business, church, family, your spouse or friends. Do celebrate the brightness you’ve been given this Christmas!

Go Forth With Abundant Courage In The Pursuit of your EP!>>>> merlin